So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
