i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
