I am spending my child support on dildos
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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