i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
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