Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
why does every cop we meet know your name?
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
