Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
