I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
