It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
