similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
