God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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