Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize