how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
