There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
