It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
