God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
