Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize