Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
