Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
