I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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