so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
