Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
So vagazzling was a success
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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