Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Mom said you looked used
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
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