bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I'm at about main and main street
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
