This girl is more easily done than said...
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
