I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize