We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
