so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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