Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize