That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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