Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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