: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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