You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
