I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
