Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
