So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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