Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
