Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Tell her she can't have a vagina
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
