Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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