its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
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