grandma shit on top of the toilet
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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