yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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