...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
