Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
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