Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Randomize