I wannas sexs uuuuu
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
NoShamevember. You game?
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
