Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
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