About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
