Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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