I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
