He is an equal opportunity slut.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
