Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
